You plan to see a rainbow but what you get to see was nothing

Topic of the day: Blaming people.

Bad day today as for me. I worked my ass off for Marketing presentation, however, not my luck that everything are clashing with one another in the same week. So, gotta admit I suck at time management. I tried my best but I was distracted by emotions turbulence which paused me for one whole day. So, in one time I'm trying to complete my report on Marketing project and doing the best for my Marketing Channel presentation. I made personal notes for everyone, photocopied it and intended to distribute it in class but only God knows why it happened, I was late for class, the printing shop made me wait for so long, I did last minute changes to my report, and all. Basic mistake: LAST MINUTE WORK! So, I was wrong, I was about on my way to class and got a text saying the lecturer was pissed by something, someone or somewhat I don't know that she left the class. She was informed that I'm gonna be late. I know it's part of my mistake but I don't really think she left class because of me... She can definitely refrain me from presenting if she was really mad just because I'm late, but she abandoned the whole class. So, of course I'm pissed if others blame me alone without reflecting their own mistakes.

I went anyway to see if I can see her to apologize, at least if she would accept my report even if she's not gonna let me present. I lost my mark for sure, but I believed it happens for a reason. Perhaps if this never happen than I'd continue with my bad habits of procrastinating work, mixing emotions with works, it was never right... It's about time to change Hanii... to realize that you're gonna have to learn to priotize what's more important. Well, back to the story, I went but she wasn't there. I called but she wouldn't pick up. I texted and she replied that I could leave the report at the administration. So, the least I could do was to say thank you for accepting my report and sorry for being so late. I don't know how am I suppose to explain to her.. I feel bad really.

But I feel even worse when classmates who were in the class (which all were late too), started to call to see if I'm seeing the lecturer cuz they want to see her too. I told them no, because the lecturer won't even pick up the phone. And when I bumped into them, they started to ask again the same question. I was trying to be patient while dealing with own frustration because of losing marks and all... But I was really pissed when a voice shout out,"salah presenter sebab datang lambat." While I know the flow of the situation, they can't be blaming me. The reason they were mad is because our lecturer doesn't want to accept their report and they blame me for that? What do I have to do with their reports? It's a definite no no that I have nothing to do with madam not accepting their reports. Memang mintak maki la wei. I wasn't trying to curse or anything but I wish they would stop blaming people and reflect if they, themselves had done anything wrong to our beloved lecturer. I told them I was sorry I was late, that I did not present my chapter and all. That was my fault but I certainly is not the reason of their reports are not accepted.

Look, I'm sorry I was pissed but I hope you'd think before you say something. It might hurt other people's feeling. And to those who thinks they've done a perfect work, think again. You might arrived early to class, submitted the report, and presented, but did you present well? Up to madam's expectation? Did your classmates hear you out? Do they understand? Or it was all piece of shit? Jangan berlagak sangat please.

Before you even blame anyone, think, did I do something wrong that causes that person to act that way? Kalau kau tak salah tak apalah, but what if you WERE wrong? hmm.

p/s: If only my lect's reading this which I know she won't? err... But would love to say millions of sorry. If only she knows how eager I am to present for Marketing Channel chapters -__-" but it's okay, it was my fault. I learned my lesson and I hope you can forgive me for this. I'll try my best again, for the next presentation, to not disappointing you, but in case you change your mind, I'd love to present to my classmates about Marketing Channel. I'm sorry Madam, tak pernah terlintas dihati to take advantage of your kindness. Sorry.

"Everybody wants happiness nobody wants pain. But you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain."