Friday, July 15, 2011

One call that matters.

I really need to chill out. Go somewhere, do something, just to kill the time. Do something that'll make me feel appreciated. Buy a gift for myself...
I know, in relationship there shouldn't be possession, I swear to God I am not trying to control him or something like that. All I ever waited for was for one call, one call after you finish work and before I go to bed, or before you go to bed... It doesn't matter if we barely even talk, but that one call mean so much to me. Even if I don't answer, when I wake up in the morning, to see there's a miscall from you, knowing that you actually called, will make my day. But, I waited and you never called... I called and you never answered. And, when I acted out weird, you asked me "what's wrong?" ??? For real? How am I supposed to explain to you? Tell me, if I explain to you just like how I wrote this post, will you understand? Will you? I think I have said about this before and yet it's happening again, and you expect me to understand this time... Maybe I don't. But I won't speak up... I'm done fighting. All I want is a call. I don't need you to come and see me and tell me you've sacrificed much for me. When I'm sad, I don't need you to be upset. So, now that I'm not telling, when I'm sad, I'll just stay alone. Keep it to myself, and hold onto it. So much for love, I can't even understand it for myself.. One call. That's all. 14.07.2011

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